Lydee Central

Since I last wrote much has happened. My life has gone topsy-turvy, upside - down, back-around, inside-out and then some. My calm in the midst of the storm? Well, I think it's obvious..................... He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide underneath the shadow of the Almighty God. Joy and pain, in sun and rain, He's the same, He never lets go...... My hope is found in Thee and my comfort unwavering. My soul will thirst for the Living God alone. I hope none of this is too heavy for my blog. It seems to be okay though, as not many people read this ;-). One day again there will be light-heartedness. Just now, I am going through an intense season in my life. My leaves are turning from green, but into all the most beautiful colors. My old self is transforming into something new - I am preparing for the winter - spiritually, practically. I have been moved to much silence aft...

So in this new season, I have looked among our photos and realized we are, what America would call a "nuclear" family. Hm.... that provokes new thoughts. If we are indeed nuclear, what do we do with our "nuclear" waste? How do we dispose of it.... when we have our problems, our defeats, our burdens? I have made a paralell, with how the world has figured out how to deal with nuclear waste - we haven't. We have made something entirely of our own, and we have not figured out how to dispose of it appropriately since we developed "nuclear" technology. So what do we do with our "waste"? We dump it. We try to cover it up - bury it, or we try to burn it, yet, none of these methods truly "cleans up" the waste or its effects on all that surround it. So too, in our families, our waste p[iles up, we try to dispose of it - sins, past & present, hidden & undisturbed, all the while the effects linger in the air, affect our children &...

As you may have noticed, my blog looks different. Just in time for Autumn. I love the smell of leaves, apples, and the cool, crisp air. I think fall and winter are two of my favorite seasons. You may also have noticed about 5 of my postings are gone. Ihave agreed that these were more appropriate for a journal that I actually handwrite in. I still feel uncomfortable having deleted these entries, but I think as time goes on, I'll just get used to it. I am having such a battle trying to follow Christ, even though people close to me refuse. I bring up scripture, talk about these struggles & what God's standard is (note: I am not denying that we fail at this & that we struggle, but the point is that it IS a struggle, not just a laying down of or giving up on who God calls us to be), yet I get no recollection of sin, not even admittance that it's there. Sin is like a necrotizing fascitis or pressure ulcer. It develops in stages, and, if left untreated, the ulcer becomes...

Natalie Grant - Perfect PeopleFrom the album Relentless Never let him see you when your breaking..Never let him see you when you fall... Thats How We Live, and Thats How We TryTell The world you've got it all together You never let him see whats underneath We cover it upwith the crooked smile but it only lasts for a little while ( chorus)There's no such thing as perfect people There's no such thing as a perfect life So come as you are, broken and scarred, lift up your heart and be amazed, and be changed by a perfect God Suddenly its like a weight is liftedwhen you hear the words that you are loved He knows where you are and were you've been and you never have to go there again (chorus) Who lived, and died, to give you life to heal our inperfections so look up, and see love, and let grace be enough There's no such thing as perfect people , There's no such thing as a perfect life So come as you are, broken and scarred, lift up your heart and be amazed and be chang...

You hold the world within Your hands, and see the tears that fall. Through every storm, through every trial, you're enough, you're always enough. I rejoice for my Savior reigns I rejoice for He lives in this, God on high, He has set me free .... Worthy is the Lord In a dry and weary land, Lord you are the rain.... -Casting Crowns-

Hard times require excess amount of trust. Wrapped in 8 years of naivety , I followed you. I rested, as you said. Laid my arms down, to be brought up by yours. Warmth, life, and joy. Why this day? Why now... Why did you? Questions left unanswered. I am at a loss. Broken glass, once was clear & sheer & pretty. My eyes turn dark, fog overwhelms. Help. I'm drowning, but not in love. Anger, frustration- hot fiery tears burn down my face. Jaded, my eyes are open. Give me time. Let me think. I run to You. What do I do? Love? Again? How do I help him? Love? Answer me, please. I wait. Quiet, peace ensues, persues me. I am consumed, fire out. I know my calling. My purpose in all. Words spoken enough words spoken, action required. I will wear this ring. Let your yes be yes He said. I said yes. I go forward, stumbling, leaning, forward. I do it for Him alone. Selfish thoughts banished by the needs at hand - not mine.

I am in need of some serious silence this week.... desperately trying to quiet the monster inside as it were. I find anger, annoyance & frustration to be debilitating. As is the case, I am falling , free falling before the cross. I once again was reminded that I am unable to do anything on my own - man, that's such a harsh reality! So, this morning, I am listening to Lifehouse. I am also attempting to clear my brain and start over from the week previous - anyone for a mind detox? I am not going to watch t.v. this week or next, or maybe for the entire month - I will blog and let you all know how it goes. I feel that this will help with sobering my heart, mind & emotions. Maybe more worship therapy will do me some good. I had been contemplating ending my blog for a while....however, I found this to be contradindicative to my (God -given) loud mouth honesty persona. Enough said. Just want to shout out to my babies - I loved spending the weekend with you guys!