Lydee Central

How can I make you see that I am for you? How can anyone force or make anyone do anything? That wouldn't be love - it would be the complete opposite. Twisted, tied up in chains, we both want the same.... I want you. I want to know all of you. I cannot make you be honest with me. I committed to wait for you. I will wait, and in my waiting, I will cling to the Rock. I will hide myself in the cleft, in the secret place. I will pray for you. I want so much to know who all of you is, but I cannot, by any power of my own make that happen - thank God. And, the sad part of all of this is that I see in your history, in your line, you all would like to be close to others, however, are you truly willing to expose yourself? You are willing and want others to be open with you on all frequencies, but are you willing to give all, to lay down all things & admit your sin? If not, then you become a co-dependent, always (seemingly ) putting other people above yourself - but, in realtiy, keeping a...

"The Hardest Part" And the hardest part Was letting go, not taking part Was the hardest part And the strangest thingWas waiting for that bell to ring It was the strangest start I could feel it go downBittersweet, I could taste in my mouth Silver lining the cloudOh and I I wish that I could work it out And the hardest part Was letting go, not taking part You really broke my heart And I tried to sing But I couldn’t think of anything And that was the hardest partI could feel it go down You left the sweetest taste in my mouth You're a silver lining the clouds Oh and I Oh and I I wonder what it’s all about I wonder what it’s all about Everything I know is wrong Everything I do, it's just comes undone And everything is torn apart Oh and it’s the hardest part That’s the hardest part Yeah that’s the hardest part That’s the hardest part

I go back and forth, like in pong. Why now? This isn't fair. But then, I should've taken things more seriously back then...I didn't. Now, I'm left here. God, do I love him, what, what do I do? Now I have to teach my little ones how to deal with adversity. My life isn't included now. I am out of the picture. What a paradox. It's not about me, only how I respond. I want to leave. I don't want to try and "see past" the differences. You said you were someone, that you believed something. I thought you did. I made a decision based on what I knew. My trust betrayed, and now, I am bombarded not just by mere "perceptions" that we hold different; it's the very basis of our unity that's in question. This is not some small, trivial thing. I pray and hope & wish that you'd be able to see how far you've roamed away. I thought I was the one who was mad. I find now that I have been thrown closer to the One to whom I owe my life. Eve...

Since I last wrote much has happened. My life has gone topsy-turvy, upside - down, back-around, inside-out and then some. My calm in the midst of the storm? Well, I think it's obvious..................... He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide underneath the shadow of the Almighty God. Joy and pain, in sun and rain, He's the same, He never lets go...... My hope is found in Thee and my comfort unwavering. My soul will thirst for the Living God alone. I hope none of this is too heavy for my blog. It seems to be okay though, as not many people read this ;-). One day again there will be light-heartedness. Just now, I am going through an intense season in my life. My leaves are turning from green, but into all the most beautiful colors. My old self is transforming into something new - I am preparing for the winter - spiritually, practically. I have been moved to much silence aft...

So in this new season, I have looked among our photos and realized we are, what America would call a "nuclear" family. Hm.... that provokes new thoughts. If we are indeed nuclear, what do we do with our "nuclear" waste? How do we dispose of it.... when we have our problems, our defeats, our burdens? I have made a paralell, with how the world has figured out how to deal with nuclear waste - we haven't. We have made something entirely of our own, and we have not figured out how to dispose of it appropriately since we developed "nuclear" technology. So what do we do with our "waste"? We dump it. We try to cover it up - bury it, or we try to burn it, yet, none of these methods truly "cleans up" the waste or its effects on all that surround it. So too, in our families, our waste p[iles up, we try to dispose of it - sins, past & present, hidden & undisturbed, all the while the effects linger in the air, affect our children &...

As you may have noticed, my blog looks different. Just in time for Autumn. I love the smell of leaves, apples, and the cool, crisp air. I think fall and winter are two of my favorite seasons. You may also have noticed about 5 of my postings are gone. Ihave agreed that these were more appropriate for a journal that I actually handwrite in. I still feel uncomfortable having deleted these entries, but I think as time goes on, I'll just get used to it. I am having such a battle trying to follow Christ, even though people close to me refuse. I bring up scripture, talk about these struggles & what God's standard is (note: I am not denying that we fail at this & that we struggle, but the point is that it IS a struggle, not just a laying down of or giving up on who God calls us to be), yet I get no recollection of sin, not even admittance that it's there. Sin is like a necrotizing fascitis or pressure ulcer. It develops in stages, and, if left untreated, the ulcer becomes...

Natalie Grant - Perfect PeopleFrom the album Relentless Never let him see you when your breaking..Never let him see you when you fall... Thats How We Live, and Thats How We TryTell The world you've got it all together You never let him see whats underneath We cover it upwith the crooked smile but it only lasts for a little while ( chorus)There's no such thing as perfect people There's no such thing as a perfect life So come as you are, broken and scarred, lift up your heart and be amazed, and be changed by a perfect God Suddenly its like a weight is liftedwhen you hear the words that you are loved He knows where you are and were you've been and you never have to go there again (chorus) Who lived, and died, to give you life to heal our inperfections so look up, and see love, and let grace be enough There's no such thing as perfect people , There's no such thing as a perfect life So come as you are, broken and scarred, lift up your heart and be amazed and be chang...