Lydee Central

July 27, 2018 Musings from a “loser” So, at 35, what do you do when you’ve been offered “help” from your family – i.e. some almost filled but mostly 30 to 40% half full glass promises to get you back into school, get you a degree, and help make you more marketable? I took the bait. Now I’m having buyer’s remorse. At  my last semester, which is approaching in fall – my parents decided to move. They house myself  and three children, and at my mother’s whim, she has told me not to take a job.  Right. That was prior to the move.  Now, enter in the daily battle of their less than sanitary exercise of leaving dishes that are dirty all over the place while they try to  clean up the house from which they have never been able to keep clean since I was 12, and you’ve got such a perfect place for me to have space to do schoolwork and have sanity.  Right. I may b e a damn snowflake for bitching about this , however,  having a s#%t hole to work out of makes for one hell of a migra

July 14, 2018 Bloggity – Realizations Regarding my Mother  As my mother’s covert comments attempted to bludgeon my past couple of days, I have had several objective realizations, the biggest one being - I need to get out ASAP. I moved back in so that I would be able to go back to school without accumulating a crap ton of debt. I'm starting to believe the debt would've been worth my sanity. Here goes with the list. 1.       My mother still has major issues with regret – hence the problem of letting “stuff” go and finding comfort in filling the house with stuff she simply never finishes or utilizes.  2.       She’s scared to complete certain projects. ON a day to day basis, and also in the case of moving. I am enjoying watching her and my father throw things out that have accumulated over the years (not my stuff    - I cleaned that crap out long ago). But daily – her mind cannot digest doing certain projects, she cannot break them down to micromanage and complete

Wednesday, July 11,2018 PREFACE:   LONG POST ******READ WITH YOUR 1ST CUP OF COFFEE. FOR REAL.****** Thoughts on Trump’s immigration reform. Referenced article:  http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/ct-immigration-children-reunited-20180710-story.html# “ Justice Department lawyer Sarah Fabian said 75 of the children are eligible for release. Another 27 cannot be immediately be reunited for various reasons, she said. Some did not cross the border with their parents. Others have parents who are serving criminal sentences. Some parents have serious criminal histories, including for child abuse, and may be deemed unfit. The American Civil Liberties Union, which is representing the parents in the class-action lawsuit, said U.S. officials "have not even tried" to return 12 children to parents who were deported, and should have more quickly found and vetted eight parents who were released in the United States. Most of the parents of the youngest children

July 2, 2018 Bloggity – Relationship Conundrums  Is It Even Worth It? Cynicism vs. Realism In a country where seemingly we have lost all capability for males to respect women (no doubt from this country having its origins in Patriarchal times), is it even worth it to attempt to develop a meaningful relationship? Have the bounds of sabotage run too deep?    How on earth can a successful woman    truly trust someone    when she’s so much at risk?  A couple of things I can attest to:  1)      Relationships involve risk. We’re all imperfect human beings, and, as such, our perfections and imperfections will surface at some point in time. The good news is  à  We are constantly evolving. No one can choose your life for you; you are radically responsible for every decision you make, come what may. That is good news, or at least, to the person who refuses to adopt the victimization mentality, it is. (Fact or article x 2)  2)      Relationships provide meaningful connections

June 23, 2018 Bloggity – Why America is not for Women, FML, and Other Musings of a Non-Traditional Leader Lyds Equal opportunity my ass. You call it equal when I am paid at $155,000 to assume the roles of three of my male counterparts, all whom have less responsibility and make $375,000 a piece? Oh, but they have families to provide for. Right. So.Do.I.  I am a single mother. That’s my own fault? No sheet. It’s also those three males’ faults for attending a university, being emotionally distant from their households, but hey, as long as that white picket fence is white washed amidst their 5-bedroom 4 bathroom 1.5-million-dollar home in the ‘burbs, you’ll look the other way. No man, no businessman, taxman, congressman, religious man, peaceful man, cares.  You know why? They’re “getting theirs”. Fuck, they’re living the goddamn dream. Because that 35k difference in annual salary is enough to get one of their kids through a good part of their undergraduate degree. Did I m

June 23, 2018 Bloggity – Relationships with a Modern Woman Or Adventures in Dating in the Post-Modern Era It begins with a swipe left for no, swipe right for yes.  20 something swipes, either way, I was developing my own algorithm so that each time I logged back in, a new hundred or so potentials would pop up on my screen. Some days, it was merely to occupy my time, other days I would read what the men actually had to say. Some days, It was man after man stating they were “single, and ready to mingle”, or “Netflix and chill” or simply a screen name of “W3tS3t”. Really. This is what the new realm of “dating” was? I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples in disbelief. At least the twenty somethings were genuine right off the bat. They wanted sex. Nothing else. No B.S. Just raw, carnal, mating.  It wasn’t out of the ordinary. The two twenty somethings I encountered were generous with me, buying me at least a drink and allowing me to talk for three or four hours. That was as intimate as th

        In an effort to up my posts and become caught up over the years I've fallen off the planet, here again is a post from my Dating Adventures (aka: My Post-Divorce Adventures in Romance, or something like that).  A little preface - I began to form a love / hate relationship with dating in 2014-2015 (my first year outta the marriage). I love getting to know people. They are interesting, beautiful, and (for better or worse), I tend to see their potential right away. This can lead me to hold on and tolerate some pretty horrible bull$heet in hopes of seeing the evolution of a human .  This doesn't always occur (hence , the hate, or exhaustion from dating) .   Here is an excerpt from this time.  June 13, 2018 – Bloggity, Single Mother Dating – Don’t take things so seriously, alternately titled, "OOPS, I dated a Felon." Encounter for a date…  Specimen’s name : JMB, from WI Social Hx., per Specimen's POV.   Was married for 20 years. Divorced w

I'm baaaaaccck... I realize I've not been on the blog scene. This hasn't meant that I've not kept up with my writing- not in the least. I have kept up and more. I am now realizing, after having  interviewed wit ha badass woman, gaining a family of weirdos (aka: rucking friends), joining the military, and getting knee deep into bodily fluids, that I should probably post these before I bite the dust.  Without further or due, I will begin with past posts (starting from 2018) and lead up to the present.  I will do my best to provide commentary etc... and I will publish my 7 years of silence series, stemming from 2011 to 2018, once I return home from my current military training.   Here's today's catch up! Enjoy!  June 15, 2018 From one extreme to the other  So recently I’ve come to find that my ex narc and my mother who is also got narc tendencies are  in opposite directions for  dolling out food to my kids. On one side, my mother (whom, yes I live