Date Night?

"We'll be there in a couple hours. You're taking one, right? Okay , well, yeah, we were just, yeah, a date. Okay, well, we understand."

This is usually the leaning of our conversations when trying to find a sitter for our son(s). My husband has had the entire summer
off, taking care of our boys & working part time for the church - but off of school (his full time +++ job). We have come to the point
of realization that during this glorious 12 week "free" period, he & I haven't had a date. It wouldn't be so odd save for the fact
that we have help at our sides (both families) - but the trouble is that we have two kids, not one. This makes the care more
difficult. I understand this , but hubby is (understandibly) perplexed at why we keep running into offers that subltely hint that
our caretaker of the supposed 'date" night is taking one, but not both of our boys. It's really hard when our older boy sees us
taking off with his brother, and, leaving him in the care of someone - even if it is family. It's like saying, "Here you go son. You
have to stay with so and so while we go hang out with each other and your brother." Talk about feeling rejected. So, in order
to avoid the awkwardness, we just don't go on dates. We had a date that lasted 2 hrs - 45 minutes of which consisted of a meal
at ihop (we were trying to be fast to try and catch a movie - did not happen), and buying new sneakers together (I know! How romantic!
Except that while I was trying to be cute by trying on high heels, my husband reminded me of our time limit),.... sigh. So we came back
"early" because we simply couldn't do anything left in the amount of time we had.
I don't know if it's just an accepted fact that when you have kids under the age of 12 (or whenever you start letting them stay home by themselves) you just don't get to go out, or if we should be voicing more of what we'd like from our care givers. I know that I miss my hubby - a lot.
I also laugh at the American Academy of Psychology & Psychiatry when they suggest that , "Married couples should designate a date night, at least once a week in order to maintain, preserve, and grow their marital relationship. This will also ultimately benefit the family social structure throughout the rest of the week."
I guess in order to drive our point home, we could always note that we're having the son that wasn't taken by our family caregiver will be left off with a sitter - who we need to pay to take care of our other son. Well, that being said, I am off to write an e-mail to a mother of multiples to ask how, when, and if she and her hubby ever got a date when they had six young children in the home....

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